Beautiful You

It's been a long time since I've written a blog post, and frankly, I didn't even know if I would write any more. But there is something that the Lord has really put on my heart lately that I feel like I really need to share. Which is the whole idea of what beauty, really?

In less than two months I'm getting married. And topic of makeup has become a bit of a controversy in my life through the talk of my upcoming wedding. 

                                            

But first, a bit of background info: When I was in high school, I had a phase where I wore a lot of makeup, I thought I looked really pretty, and we bought it and my parents spent way too much money on it. And for about 10 days I wore it non-stop. After that, I found it too much work to put it on every morning, take it off every night, so I stopped. And I immediately lost about 20 'friends' at school in the span of a day. After that I decided to never wear makeup again on a regular basis so that I would know that my friends love me for who I am and not how I look. But I've still kept it in the back of my closet for special occasions. Like, weddings for example. I used to always think that I would save my makeup to wear on my wedding day to really "wow" my groom. 

But now that I'm engaged, and I have a man who loves me just as God made me. I've recently learned that he actually doesn't like it when I wear makeup. At first I was a bit insulted, that he didn't like the job I did on myself because I thought I looked pretty. But after thinking about it more, I have been realizing at what point I'm enormously blessed to have a man who doesn't like the artificial me, but the woman who God created me to be, natural and not fake. 

A few weeks ago a friend did my makeup for a worship concert we were going to. But after I put it on, I had this feeling that my fiancé really didn't like it, and I had this awful gut feeling. I know we're not married yet, but it says in the Bible that I need to submit to him, and now is good practice, for certain things like this. "Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord." Ephesians 5:22 When we got to the concert, I saw countless women wearing makeup, some much more than others. It kind of surprised me, I mean, we were going to a church, I guess I forgot at what point even churchgoing women wear loads of makeup, because I don't see it very often anymore where I go to church. But before the concert started, I went to the washroom, one big washroom, several stalls, and obviously a big line for the women's. While in the stall I felt like God was telling me to take off my makeup. It was actually a big thing for me. I mean, it wasn't like there were just individual washrooms; there were women lined up at the door and others coming and going to the sink. But I wanted to be obedient to God. So I went and after washing my hands, I started taking off my eye shadow and eye liner. I don't know how many women were watching me. It's entirely counter-cultural, that right BEFORE the concert, in the washroom, I was in front of the mirror "de-beautifying" myself, as the world sees it. But I think what I was doing was making myself more beautiful in God's eyes, more pure, more like the way He created me. I hope it was a testimony to the other women watching me, and I pray that even if they started thinking twice about their own makeup that they were wearing that all the glory would be to God. 

I've had many people giving me their opinions about why I should wear makeup at my wedding. So in light of this, I decided to look in God's Word about what God thinks of this, and what is true beauty in His eyes. That way I would know what the Truth is about all this. Here's some passages I found to be very useful:

"Do not let your adorning be external--the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear--but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart, with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God's sight is very precious." 1 Peter 3:3-4

"... For the LORD sees not as man sees: man looks on the outward appearance, but the LORD looks on the heart." 1 Samuel 16:7

Okay, so according to God, true beauty has nothing to do with what we do on the outside of us. According to the world and our society, beauty has everything to do with the outside of us. According to God, true, imperishable beauty (isn't that what everyone wants anyway? A beauty that will never fade?) comes from having a gentle and quiet spirit, it's what is inside us and not outside that makes us truly beautiful. In fact the Bible says that our adorning should NOT be external. I don't know about you, but I feel like when I see a woman who is at peace in her heart, who is gentle in spirit, who cares for and loves others, who is confident and loves God... you don't even notice what she wears, but you know she is beautiful, she has this sweet aroma about her that draws you to her because she has the imperishable beauty that the Bible is talking about here. These verses really spoke to me about makeup though "Do not let your adorning be external..." when I put on makeup, that's external adorning. I want to be adorning myself the way that God wants me to be adorning myself, so if I'm wearing makeup to make me look pretty, or to gain respect, or to fit in, then no! I can't. Because, He says that my beauty comes from adorning myself on the inside. And God is looking at my heart. We spend so much time putting on makeup and picking out the perfect outfit, in order to adorn ourselves on the outside, but do we spend at least as much or more time adorning ourselves on the inside? Reading what true beauty is to God, and working on making ourselves beautiful on the inside? It's a question I need to ask myself too!

Okay, so if we know that we should work on adorning ourselves on the inside... then I have been asking the question what should my clothes be like? We've still gotta wear something!

"Women should adorn themselves in respectable apparel, with modesty and self-control, not with braided hair and hold or pearls or costly attire, but with what is proper for women who profess godliness--with good works." 1 Timothy 2:9-10

Okay, so we should wear what is modest and respectable. I know this differs for everyone, but I think for me personally it's becoming more and more to wear clothes that don't necessarily draw a whole lot of attention to yourself, or wearing clothes that scream: "look at me!" But if we keep reading, it also says that we should adorn ourselves with self-control and good works, these are also things that come from within us, and not what we put on our body on the outside.

So the moral of the story is, I prayed about whether or not I should wear makeup at my wedding, and the answer is no. I also felt that God wanted me to take a leap of faith and not wear makeup at all for teaching, or any other thing where I would tend to use it to look less tired, or to gain respect, or anything else, but to just trust in the Lord. I'd been talking to my Mom about all this as well, and a few days after she was like, "you know you're right I think, and that's why I decided to throw all my makeup out!" Wou hou Mom! So I also decided to follow suit this past weekend, if I'm not going to wear it for anything else, why bother keeping it? *This is just my conviction, and I want to share and encourage you, it's not to condemn, and I'm not against women who wear makeup, not at all! But this is something I really feel like God wants me to share.

When thinking about myself, I know that God has made me and that I am beautiful "Because [the LORD your God] has made you beautiful." Isaiah 60:9 but I still have trouble believing it.

Last week I went to a friend's house and we painted together. I wanted to paint something for my eventual new house for when I get married. I drew mountains. There was a party there and others were looking at my painting too, and some were less encouraging than others, like telling me all the things I could add or change to make it better. And I understand that I don't always paint, so it was a first for me, but at the same time, it hurt a little bit. The friend I was painting with encouraged me though, because the whole reason for the background was to paint the Bible verse on the front of it. Which encouraged me.

But I got to thinking, if I am God's creation, and I am always finding things that I don't like, that I would like to change to make my body better, am I not insulting the Artist who made me? We need to be careful what we say to other children of God as well. Talking about the power of our words could be totally another blog post, but just to caution each of us in what we say to others (particularly women) about their bodies. Jesus when talking about how we treat other people said, "Truly, I say to you, as you did it to one of the least of these my brothers and sisters, you did it to Me." Matthew 25:40. So we need to be kind and encouraging and loving with our words towards others, because each of us are God's creation. "For we are God's masterpiece..." Ephesians 2:10, if I'm God's masterpiece, God who is perfect in every way, then am I not made perfectly beautiful? Exactly as I was supposed to be made? The answer is yes! It's been teaching me to grow in confidence in God and who He made me to be. To grow in confidence and believing that I am beautiful the way He made me, not by all the changes I can make on the outside to myself. And challenging me to grow in God and in developing more inner beauty that is imperishable and precious in God's sight. I hope you can find the freedom to do the same and to learn to love the way God made you to be. Because you are beautiful!

Check out this song, ça vaut la peine :)